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Other Humor
Intro
No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any
Means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by
Any information storage and retrevial system, without permission in writing
from me
including all pictures and rhymes
I dedicate this book
To Stacey and Scott
But without Haley and Robbie
Bubi…I’m not
Arrival
Arrival in Belize
On April twenty-nineth
Two thousand and three
From Akron Ohio
Belize it will be
No ramps to the gate
To the airport you walk
Waving from the balcony
English they talk
To customs I went
My passport was marked
Thirty days in the country
I’m officially embarked.
Next to get luggage
Carts they provide
One line goes through
And one looks inside
Placencia down south
Quickly I plea
So Maya or Tropic
Have you space for me?
As we fly down the coast
Over green land below
The crystal blue water
Waves us hello
Dangriga in sight
We start to descend
Through a field of bananas
With the sea at one end
In just a short while
We are back in the air
You can’t beat the view
It’s well worth the fare
First Year and More
Year One
The first house I rented
Was right on the beach
The Caribbean sea
Was easy to reach
A beautiful sunrise
Would start off my day
Breezes would blow
To keep the heat away
I collected rain water
Which was different for me
No sewers or disposals
Like in my city
My next house to rent
Was on a canal
An observation deck
Made it the perfect locale
To the east was the sea
To the west the lagoon
That’s where my lot is
I’ll be there soon
The snow and the cold
I will leave behind
Belize I am staying
I’ve made up my mind
Red Kayak
Red Kayak .
False Caye is the island
That I’m heading for
I look at it daily
Right out my door
I bought a red kayak
With a clear bottom to see
The underwater miracles
So new to me
The coral is amazing
I think you’ll agree
Brains, fans, and trees
All under the sea
I recognize snapper
Barracuda and snook
Sting Rays and jelly fish
They’re in the guide book
Of the wonders I’ve seen
My favorite by far
Is orange and it is shaped
Just Like a star
No touching or taking
Just let them be
You see in Belize
We are eco-friendly
House
House
I bought a house which was built
But move it I must
There’s only one person….
Abe I can trust
He put it on a trailer
Two days it did take
A tractor pulled it carefully
It was on my lot by eight
A new roof it received
New poles to sit on
An autographed tank
One more porch….it is done
Scarlet and grey are the colors
There would be no debate
After all I went to college
At Ohio State
I sit on my porch
Every morning and night
The mountains and water
What a beautiful sight
I live in Belize
But as you can see
You can never take the buckeye
Out of me
Placencia Road
Placencia Road
The road to placencia
Is something to behold
Just look at our cars
And the story unfolds
Red blue or black
Is the paint from the store
But drive on this road
It’s terracotta once more
They grate for us
Putting stones all around
So then when we drive
Flat tires are found
Wet season Dry season
We always complain
When is the government
Going to easy all our pain
But when it’s paved
The traffic will come
Progress they call it
Oh what have we done
The mud and the dust
We hated each day
Where’s our old road
I’ll bet we will say
Cockscomb
Cockscomb
Jaguars I’m told
Live in Belize
So where do I go
Cockscomb I believe
I’m going to the jungle
I must be prepared
Pants, shoes and socks
Bug spray…I’m scared
I look for those cats
They are spotted or black
What’s up ahead?
Could that be their tracks?
The park is beautiful
With miles to explore
Hike to a waterfall
Tubing and more
The day is well spent
You’ll love what you see
Don’t be disappointed
No jaguars to be
There’s one place for sure
Where animals you’ll find
Belize Zoo has them all
It’s one of a kind
The Cayes
The Cayes
Water taxis run daily
Or just take a flight
Travel reminder
We don’t go at night
Thirty miles of beach,
restaurants and bars
With golf carts to rent
You won’t need a car
Resorts are plenty
Shopping is great
The reef is so close
You can watch the waves break
The tourists all love it
First choice it will be
Out of 200 islands
It’s Ambergris Caye
Caye Caulker it’s neighbor
Is a much slower pace
If “laid back” you want
Then this is the place
Snorkel or dive
Sunrise or sunset
The cayes are a vacation
That you won’t forget
Who Am I
Who Am I?
Buffy Buffy
Don’t be afraid
Just pretend that
You Are Brave
My mother taught me this
When I was first born
Seine Bight village it’s called
The outdoors was my home
One day I was moved
And boy did I shout
But Maya Beach was the place
It’s my new hangout….
Buffy Buffy
Don’t be afraid
Just pretend
That you are brave
I have 2 dogs for friends
Lucky and Deli they’re named
And smudge is my boyfriend
Atleast that’s what he claims
When it thunders and lightnings
I run and I hide
And then I remember
A poem deep inside…..
Buffy Buffy
Don’t be Afraid
Just Pretend
That you are brave
Do you know who I am
I have four legs and purr
And all of my body
Is covered in fur
A jaguar I’m not
But I rhyme with a bat
Yes you are right
I am a Belizean cat!
Whale Shark
Whale Sharks
When the full moon is out
Five days either way
The whale sharks appear
15 tons they do weigh
They don’t come near shore
Pass the reef you must go
But you get to do diving
Or snorkel before
We stopped at silk cayes
They’re a beautiful site
White sand and palm trees
I could spend the night
But after our lunch
It was our turn to try
The largest fish in the world
45 feet just swim by
.
No luck did we have
But what can I say
400 species of fish
Ain’t bad for one day
Late spring to early summer
Each year they appear
So I’ll save my money
And go back next year
Belmopan
Belmopan
Belmopan is the place
I go with my friend
It’s the capital now
Overnight we would spend
In the government offices
Paperwork we would leave
Then on to do shopping
For things that we need
We drove there by car
Two hours it took
Johnny Cakes at the Esso
Who had time to cook
We watch for the waterfall
In the mountains we’d find
We talk and we sing
Leave our troubles behind
On our journey back home
The sleeping giant we’d see
A man in the mountains
Now how can that be?
Fruits trees and pineapples
All up and down
Hummingbird is the highway
Where this can be found
We’d stop for a drink
At Over the Top
Then we would come
To my favorite spot
With no traffic in sight
In the middle of the curve
The gear is in neutral
This really takes nerve
Downhill it should roll
But backwards you go
Unbelizeable I say
Thanks for the show
Mayan Ruins
Maya Ruins
You came to see ruins
We have some of the best
In all four directions
North South East and West
The mayans lived here
A million or more
Building cities and pyramids
Two thousand years ago
In the 60’s and 70’s
Excavations began
Calendars, ceramics
The archaeologist sang
This ancient civilization
We continue to explore
Deciphering hieroglyphics
Each year we learn more
Altun Ha and Lumani
Northeast or Northwest
Nim Li Punit and Lubaatun
South and then west
Cahal Pech and Xunantunich
To the west you must go
But while you are there
Stay in San Ignatio
There’s one more to mention
The largest of all
Caracol in the southwest
They defeated Tikal
Monkey River
Monkey River
On a boat you will go
From lagoon to the sea
Dolphins and manatees
You are likely to see
As you get to the river
Iquanas appear
Crocodiles sleeping
You’re happy to hear
The birds are chirping
All kinds of songs
But monkeys in trees
Is why I came along
Howler monkeys they are
And atlast we did find
A family of four
All swinging from vines
I looked at the monkeys
In their eyes I could see
Why did you come here?
My answer…curiosity
The monkeys went home
And so did we
I was glad to meet them
And they to meet me
Punta Gorda
Punta Gorda
Toledo’s the district
Where PG can be found
On the Bay of Honduras
The southernmost town
savannahs you’ll pass
Just like Africa I’m told
Don’t look for elephants
There’s none to behold
Mountains invite you
Come and explore
Ruins and caves
Animals galore
All kinds of birds
Monkeys and cats
And at two in the morning
I’m following tapir tracks
Known for its fishing
Rivers and cayes
A fly on a hook
The flats it will be
Catch a bonefish, a tarpon
And permit in one day
Grand Slam it is called
The Belizean way
Mayan villages await you
Come spend the night
The culture down here
Is way out of sight
You can get there by boat
A bus, plane or car
Visit this area
It’s rated 5 stars
Singing Sands
Maya Beach is the place
Where this resort you will find
A jungle and the sea
It is one of a kind
If you are stressed out
This is just what you need
A swim in the pool
Or canoe to False Caye
The gardens are beautiful
It's amazing to see
Vines in the restaurant
And flowers in trees
A thatched roof cabana
Is your room for the night
Free breakfast you get
To start your day right
Tours are plenty
Fishing and snorkeling too
Or just read a book
It's all up to you
So come stay with us
Or just for a meal
Fish Fry on Friday
Call..it's a deal!
Last poem.....friends
This last rhyme for now
Thanks family and friends
For all you support
My love I do send
Friends
People people I’m all about
Shut me in and I will shout
People people I’m all about
The web and tv
Are great substitutes
But people people I’m all about
Give me a beer and
Great company
I’ll be the happiest
You’ve ever seen…
Gmail and hotmail
And smart phone too
Allow me to communicate
Daily with you
Friends are the best
I can’t live without
Cause people people I’m all about
....
....
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